Lord_Comedy
Late for work
While she was "flying" down the road yesterday (20 miles over the
limit), a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar
gun on the other side lying in wait.
The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, and with that classic
patronizing smirk we all know and love(?), asked, "What's your
hurry?"
To which she replied, "I'm late for work."
"Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?"
"I'm a rectum stretcher," she responded.
The cop stammered, "A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does
a rectum stretcher do?"
"Well," she said, "I start by inserting one finger, then I work my
way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole
hand in. I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and
then I slowly but surely stretch, until it's about 6 feet wide."
"And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole?" he asked.
"You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge…"
Traffic Ticket: $105.00
Court Costs: $45.00
Look on Cop's Face: PRICELESS